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Published 1629 days - 1 star
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.
Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.